My Immortal

For a long time, my housemate would play Evanescence’s “My Immortal” till the melody became a “worm in my head.” I never realised how beautiful and deep the lyrics were till I heard it playing as part of the movie “Daredevil” which I caught on TV three days ago.

Here are two YouTube uploads of the song.

Evanescene’s original version

The acoustic live performance

Having lost several loved ones through death and a number through breakdowns in the relationships, the song evoked feelings and memories of…

• the pain of loss relationships
• the reality that no relationship is ever really forever (in this life)

The fear and paranoia of losing someone can be the very thing that precipitates the losing. What do I do with the hidden fears that surface? 

Today I chose to:

DANCE as though no one is watching me…
LOVE as though I have never been hurt before…
SING as though no one can hear me…
LIVE as though heaven is on earth…

No short cuts2

This afternoon I spent time cleaning up my old place so that someone else could use it. I enjoyed the solitude. I reflected on the many memories at had there — the joys and the tears. I felt my heavenly Father’s presence with me.

A good part of the time at my old place was spent shredding two big boxes of old documents on the office shredder which I had borrowed home. The shredder wouldn’t take more than four to five sheets at a time. Obviously I got impatient when I saw how slow the pile was moving.

I attempted to speed it up by putting more sheets in, but the paper got jammed and I ended up spending more time unclogging the bits that were left lodged between the blades.

I thought about the current situation that I am in and how impatient I am for people and things to change. It’s no accident that I am reminded twice on the same day that some things, like baking bread and shredding paper, just take time.

No short cuts

Ah! The fresh aroma of home-baked bread!

Two days ago, the shop delivered my new bread machine. Twice in a row, the bread I attempted to bake turned out to be hard like rock — nothing like the results my old bread machine used to produce for me. I panicked for a while and wondered if I had made a mistake switching brands.

Last night, I finally took time to read the manual after the two mini disasters — Ha! the new one doesn’t operate like the old one. This morning, it occured to me that I had used the “rapid bake” function which takes only an hour (normal bake takes four hours).

Some things just take time, and, one should always try to read the manual before attempting to use the gadget.